I am trapped in the longest night ever. Laundry pile upon laundry pile, Sex and the City upon Sex and the City. My bags are expertly packed -- a week's worth of miniaturely folded clothes in a carry-on roughly the size of my purse. I've have my FAA-regulation plastic baggie of mini moisturizers, etc, two alarms set, the fridge cleared of moldables, the iPod charged.

Usually I run through my few hours of night more quickly than imaginable, no time for ironing or toe-nail polishing. Now tonight I've nothing left but to go to sleep and wake up and go to New York, but I'm not sleepy and the night is not moving along quickly enough with me awake.

When will it end?!?